For the first few months of my mission I thought I was a
terrible missionary. Not because I was disobedient, didn't know the doctrine,
or had low key indicator numbers, but because I was an introvert. I hated
talking to people. People would comment about how I am "so quiet."
And then later in my mission when I'd built up an extrovert facade, they would
remark with pride how much I'd "come out of my shell." And that made
me feel like I couldn't be who I really was because in their eyes an introvert
doesn't make a good missionary.
But, one day I read a scripture that we’re all familiar with
with the question "Are introverts good missionaries?" in mind:
"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their
weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is
sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble
themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become
strong unto them."
And what stood out to me was not that our weaknesses will
magically become our strengths, but that our "weak things will become
strong." In other words, our weaknesses become strengths. Now before I’m
sent home for teaching false doctrine, here’s an example: as an introvert, I am
not a good public speaker or teacher, and I am not good at approaching and
talking to strangers. But because of these things that I consider my weaknesses
in missionary work, I have strengths that come from them. I am not a good
public speaker but I am great at one on one personal conversations; I am not
good at talking to strangers, but I form deep relationships; I am not a good
teacher, but I am a good listener; because of my weaknesses, I have strengths.
Sometimes we think that we have to fit in this box to be a good missionary, but
what if what the people in your area need is not a good speaker, but a good
listener? What if they need your weaknesses?
There are many examples in the scriptures of introverts
being powerful missionaries. Moses hated public speaking and being the center
of attention. So he had his brother Aaron do the talking. Paul would much
rather be in the background. Why do you think that most of the words we have
from him are from letters he wrote and not sermons he gave? Sam was the silent
saint beside his extrovert brother Nephi. And what about Lehi, Nephi’s brother
in the book of 3rd Nephi. Esther and Ruth are more great examples of quiet
resilience and strength. I don’t think either of them cared to be in the
spotlight, but when it was required of them, they rose up and did amazing
things. These scripture heroes did amazing things because of their nature, not
in spite of it.
If you’re an extrovert with an introvert companion, be aware
of them. If they have something to say, don’t keep talking and bulldoze them
because it takes a lot of effort for them to speak up. Be patient. You get
energy from talking to and being around people all day, but it exhausts your
companion. Please don’t get angry at your companion for not talking enough or
for seeming reserved. Instead use their gifts that come from the things you see
as their weaknesses.
If you’re an introvert, be proud of who you are. It’s okay
to be quiet and to not feel comfortable talking. Sometimes you will have to go
out of your comfort zone like Esther did when she came before king Ahasuerus.
Don’t make your extrovert companion do all of the teaching or socializing
though. Being willing to to do as much as you can will improve your
relationship with your companion and boost your confidence in yourself. And
most importantly, know that you are a good missionary even when you aren’t the
first to talk. We all have unique gifts and talents to offer because that’s how
Heavenly Father made us. There is a power in introverts in a world that can’t
stop talking.
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